Great, Great Aunt Laura.

One day when Megan was little she asked me what I was reading in the newspaper.  I said, "I'm reading about the oldest man in the world."  Her eyes brightened and she excitedly asked, "Oh!!!  Is it Daddy?!"

Well, turns out, it wasn't daddy.

But, happily, we are related to someone who is famously old.  She is our girls' great, great Aunt Laura.  She turned 106 this September 3rd, making her almost exactly 100 years older than Andrew.  And this woman is amazing.

When she was in her eighties she learned to speak Spanish because they needed more Spanish-speaking temple workers.  And when she was in her nineties she used to rake the neighbors lawns because, as she said, "they were getting old and couldn't get around as well anymore".  

She still lives alone in her house and when we visited her this weekend she had just finished mopping her floor and picking tomatoes from her garden.  She is as spry as a little 80-year-old.  Are 80-year-olds spry?  Well, she's as spry as a spry one.  We asked to see a book she had made and she hopped off her chair and scuttled swiftly into the kitchen, grabbed the heavy book and hauled it back out by herself.

Right now she is the second oldest person living in our state.  We're hoping she can hold out 'til she places first.

Go Aunt Laura!!

The Coat Story

For my birthday I bought myself a cute retro-style coat that I love.  I wore it for the first time when my sisters took me out to lunch.  Everything was going well until my youngest sister walked into the restaurant wearing the exact same coat!  We live an hour away from each other and had still happened to shop at the same store, in the same town, where we bought the exact same coat.  My sister-in-law, sensing the trend, ran out and bought one too.

A Birthday and a Bad Poem

There is a young dad
Who didn't get mad,
But went away to India
While he was away
He had a birthday
And I ain't even kiddin' ya.

He turned thirty-six(?)
And had no one to fix
Him a birthday cake with candles
He cried all day long
And sang his own song
As tears dropped onto his sandals.

Before I slaughter any more poetry,
(or get any more depressing)
maybe I should stop here and just say:

Happy Birthday Casey!!!

Here is a list of things I love about Casey:
(Shared not only to express love, but to embarrass the socks off him--he shouldn't be wearing socks with sandals anyway).

That he's so in love with Edith Penelope
That he's such a devoted dad
That he helps his pitiful extended family with taxes and computer problems
That he faithfully serves in the scouting program for years and years even though he hates nature, camping, and socializing
That he can play computer games and participate in family functions at the same time
That he pretends not to be competitive
That he faithfully reads people's blogs (and just as faithfully refuses to comment)
That he answers the phone on the first ring, even though he has phone-aphobia
That he eats bagels as a part of his healthy diet
That he's such a good uncle to my kids
That he loves basketball, even when it rips his lips
That he's so talented, kind, and willing to help.

Violent Tendencies

This last weekend I helped babysit for my nieces and nephew. The violence that ensued reminded me of my own childhood when my parents would leave. I was witness to kicking, yelling, threatening, bawling, chasing, and machete-whacking intentions.
But I knew things were on the upswing when I witnessed this tender moment:
My nephew hugged his older sister and apologetically said, "Sorry I tried to whack your face with a machete..."

Later, when I was recounting the horrors to my dad, I said, "Who in their right mind would give a machete to a little boy with violent tendencies?!"
Looking slightly abashed, my dad said: "Me."

Backhanded Compliments

My Sister

Jenny, that coat is cute. . . .your whole outfit is cute. You don't even look like yourself!

My Mom

Me: I'm so glad I'm still friends with my third-grade best friend.

Mom: She's so unique isn't she? She's so patient.

Magical Moments at Disney

Grumpy Parking

When our first day's attempt at free parking didn't turn out right, we were all a little ornery. We finally gave up and drove straight to the park and paid our $12 per car. As we were about to board the shuttle, we realized we needed to make a note of where we parked. The Magic Kingdom lots are named after dwarfs and we had somehow, fittingly, parked in "Grumpy".

Something's Fishy

We were all enjoying the aquariums at Epcot, but my mom especially liked a wall-sized tank full of fish. She commented on how interesting it is that fish swim in schools and how beautiful the fish looked. She might have been wondering why she was the only one enjoying that particular fish tank when my dad explained to her that it was just a cartoon projected on the wall. She said, "But it looks so real!" and we were all like, "Yeah.....totally."
(p.s. When Andrew walked by it, he immediately said, "That's fake.")

The Water Valve

If my mom has trouble deciphering what's fake, my dad must have troubles figuring out what's real. We were eating lunch at the Backlot Express which looks like a big barn, and my dad points to an exposed water valve and says, "So do you guys think that valve is real or fake?" Dave says, "Real." And my dad is like, "Nope. It's fake. Do you want to know how I know? They would never put a valve within reach of kids." To prove his point, my dad turns the valve until a loud hissing noise convinced him to quickly tighten it back up.
That was our cue to go.

What is the Word for Ambidextrous?

While we were driving one day, the kids were trying to think of the word for the ability to use both hands. Rachel suggested 'quadrepalegic' and Megan said, "No, it's 'aquamarine'!"

Water Technology

Andrew was riding on his dad's back in the pool and yelled out to me, "Look at me, Mom! I'm surfin'! I'm surfin' the web!"

Getting Soft

We were pretty pampered on our trip. We each had a large bedroom, comfy bed, and our own TV. I realized just how pampered we were one night after I'd tucked Andrew in. I could hear him in his room calling for Megan, so I went in to see what he needed.
He said, "Megan's gone and she left me with all the work!!"
Baffled I said, "What work?"
With all the exasperation he could manage he said, "I had to turn off the TV!"

Metaphorically Exhausted

We had a few long days at the parks and one day Andrew poetically announced:
"I'm as tired as a pig! I mean, I'm as tired as a dinosaur!"
(But not too tired to express his fatigue using really bad similes.)

Sausage Snack

Every day we went to a park, Dave carried a pickled sausage in his shirt pocket. (He chose that snack not only for its protein content, but for the fact that no one would ever want to share it with him). Finally, I saw him eat it. The next day I was surprised to see the package still in his pocket. I pulled it out and saw that he had one bite left and I was thinking, good thing he held onto that. I mean, you never know when you're going to have the sudden need for one bite of pickled sausage. You just never know.

Public Display of Affection

We had three sets of grandparents with us on this trip which was a blast, but could also get a little confusing. Andrew would say things like, "You mean that grandma, or that one?" Anyway, I guess the grandparents got themselves mixed up sometimes too. On our first day at Magic Kingdom, my dad was walking along and reached his hand out behind him to hold my mom's hand. My mother-in-law saw the opportunity and seized it (literally) by holding his hand as a joke. It took him a second to realize he had the wrong grandma.
After that, he looked behind him before he held hands with anyone.

Splashy Mountain

My father-in-law, Dave, got soaking wet every day at the parks. The water always seemed to be aimed at him (which totally entertained the rest of us). But one day, the splash mechanism in Splash Mountain wasn't working, so Rex took it into his own hands to get Dave wet. Every time we went by a splash zone, he scooped up some water and threw it directly at Dave. Dave kept saying things like, "The water seems to be aiming right at me!" and "I thought I wouldn't get wet sitting in the middle, but I'm getting more wet than usual" and "I'm even getting wet when there's not even splashing." The intense giggling never even clued Dave in, but Rex finally confessed his misdeed on our last day there.