August 28, 2010

Yard Sale

I hosted a garage sale at my house today along with about eight other people.  It was, of course, fraught with mayhem and funny stories.  Here are a few:

Yellow Sweater
My friend's daughter picked out a yellow sweater that she wanted to buy.  I started laughing because that friend had bought it for herself years ago and then handed it down to me.  Then I had given it to my mom, and my mom had brought it to the yard sale.  And now, years later, the sweater was going back to the original owner.  

Cardboard Wardrobe
My dad won the award for bringing the item the least likely to sell.  It was a hideous, broken, water-damaged wardrobe made out of cardboard!  So disgusting.  My dad told my kids that he'd pay five dollars to anyone who could actually sell it.  No one could.  When the wind blew it over, we just left it for dead.  When everything was over, my kids gleefully jumped on it until it broke.  Then Andrew spent another happy hour stabbing it with a stick.

After the violent attack, we threw away the pieces of the moldy cardboard corpse.
And, Dad, you are forbidden to bring anything to the next yard sale.

The Bike
Towards the end of the sale, a neighbor brought over a bike that he'd just bought at another garage sale.  He said the six-year-old son he bought it for hated it, couldn't even stand the sight of it.  It was the most normal looking bike in the world, but he never wanted to see it again, so they brought it over for us to sell.
The first kid who came by after the bike was left wanted to buy it.  The sign on the seat said $5 but he was so excited about it that he offered $10.  I told him he was only allowed to pay the marked price, so he consented to half price, paid it, then happily rode away with his purchase.
An hour after the yard sale was over, we heard a knock on the door.  It was the new bike owner's little sister wondering if we had any more bikes.

Patio Furniture
My friend was selling a nice set of patio furniture for $50.  It was so nice that my mom raised the selling price to $75 since it was more fair.  It was a great find and we eventually had two people dueling over it.  Then after one dueling party left, the other tried to talk the price down!     

The Gumball Machine
My nephew wanted to come to the garage sale so bad.  He had a gumball machine that he just had to sell.  His parents brought him over so he could display it.  He set it on the table, slapped a $2 sticker on it and a few minutes later he made a sale!  It was sold to his younger sister for the discounted price of $1.50!

The Frame
My sister received a gaudy frame for a wedding present and she was determined to sell it.  As the day went on and she had no takers, she started getting desperate.  Finally she made one last-ditch effort.  A woman was browsing through things and my sister put the frame right in front of her.  She picked it up and looked a little interested but then set it down. My sister chased her down and cut the price in half and the woman finally took it.

Charlie Brown Tree
My sister-in-law bought us a Charlie Brown Christmas tree for a present last Christmas and we put it up and enjoyed it, but I didn't really want to hang onto it.  So I put it in the garage sale.  It wasn't until halfway through the sale that I realized I shouldn't be selling it when my sister-in-law was there selling things too.  Ooopsie.

Kitchen Sink
Yes, we had everything, including the kitchen sink.


  1. awesome! what better stories to have on a white trash blog than garage sale stories!! i love that emily (it was emily right?) forced someone to buy her picture frame. the gumball machine sold to the little sister is great. and what is the deal with the kid who hated that bike? when two other kids LOVED it. weird. funny stuff.

  2. oh wait, the funniest one of all is the one that fights over the furniture and then asks for a lower price!!! pretty hard for her to act nonchalant about it after that.

  3. Hmmmmmm, How much is that kitchen sink? That looks like a lot of fun. I'm sorry I missed it. :-( I earned $60 at our last garage sale. That averages to be about $3 an hour for my time :-P

  4. Please, someone take the kitchen sink. I will pay handsomely for it to go.

  5. hee heeeee! i love that the brother got his sister to buy his gumball machine from him. ha! wonderful stories, all! how much for that child-sized cafe chair? do you offer shipping?

  6. Great stories. I like garage sales when I'm a shopper, but not so much as a seller. So much work!

  7. Cardboard wardrobe is fun to say.

  8. I'm too lazy to garage sale. But if I did maybe I would stop accidentally giving my "keep" pile to the thrift stores! I love the stories. That would be my kid hating the bike. Tal actually tried a couple of bikes at a sale on Saturday and cursed them both! I scored at that sale. Two pairs of kid skis--$5 each! Woo hoo!