July 27, 2010

Toilet Seat Covers

Has anyone else been baffled by how to use a toilet seat cover?  I mean properly use one?  My first experience with these covers was years ago.  I went in a stall and saw a seat cover dispenser.  The instructions said "Pull up and then down".  I started vigorously pulling up and down, but nothing happened.  And, yes, I was pulling up and down on the empty cardboard container that would have held the covers.  I guess in this automated world of waving hands under faucets  I thought I could pull on some cardboard box and out would pop a seat cover.

Since then, I've only pulled up and then down on actual seat covers.  But then I have another problem: to rip or not to rip the perforated middle.  If I do rip it then it drops in the toilet and pulls the whole thing in before I even sit down.  If I don't rip it then it can turn into a bit of a soggy mess--if you know what I mean.  So I've compromised: I rip it only half way and then hope for the best.

I finally decided to look up online the real way to use one.  Here's what I discovered:

You're supposed rip the perforated middle all the way.  Then you fold it backwards--like away from the toilet bowl--so that it won't slip into the water.  It's a little embarrassing that I never even thought of that!

And then, get this, you're supposed to throw it away.  Uh, most of the time I accidentally drop the first one in and have to get a second one to use.  Then the used one gets sucked in when I flush. (And if it doesn't, then I kick it in).  And anyway, we're protecting our backsides from the toilet seat but then we're supposed to grab it with our hands and throw it away?

I guess I've clogged up my share of public toilets, how about you?

8 comments:

  1. ha! so funny and gross. i just use the "hover" technique these days. not only sanitary, but good for toning the thighs. i hate public bafrooms. and guys have things way too easy in my opinion.

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  2. What?!! you're supposed to throw those things in the trash can? Men's bathrooms don't have any trash cans anywhere near the stall. I think they are afraid that we would mistake it for the toilet (and that wouldn't be pretty if you know what I mean)

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  3. Hey, I usually waste one too. Well, now I know!

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  4. What??? Wow, I thought it was neat how when you flush it sucks it down - I just assumed that was the way it was supposed to go. This has been very educational. It's these types of things that everyone wonders about but nobody talks about. I love that you looked up a tutorial on-line! I've never ripped on the perforated line. I just throw it down and hope for the best. That is just weird about throwing it away though. It seems like that would just be messy. Maybe legally they have to write that but they don't really expect anyone to do it. Or to ever read the tutorial for that matter!!! :-)

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  5. The things I learn from you! This is brilliant. I, too, have been duped by the covers and have resorted to hovering. Have you seen my thighs? I mean, they're fantastic. I'm so impressed that you looked up the tutorial. But I REALLY love that you pulled up and down on the cardboard! Hahahahahahahahahaha. Ha.

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  6. oh sick! i hate public restrooms! yuck! i always kick it into the toilet. AND i ONLY sit down if I HAVE TO bc GROOOOOOOOOOOSS!!!! Ugh. That is funny about folding the middle part back! what? ahhaha. I think the last one i used didn't even have a middle part!

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  7. After so many trips to Asia--I'm a master squatter and don't even bother :)

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  8. I have a whole new standard of sanitation than I did 2 months ago. I get pretty excited if the public bathroom has a toilet seat because dirty porcelain is cold and I am too lazy to hover. Oh and you dont flush toilet paper here... it goes in the garbage can. Smells great. they have design issues with their septic systems. Incidentally, has unprotected toilet seat use ever resulted in proven disease transmission. That should be your next blog. ;-)

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